Why the Fear of Failure is Fake

 

I think that many people believe that their fear of failure is what is holding them back from accomplishing their dreams.   But by not going after your dream you are also failing.  Digging into the root of your fear can allow you to see what is really holding you back from living the life you dream of and I am all about everyone Dreaming Bigger!

In this episode we will cover:

  • New perspective on failure.
  • What do you actually fear?
  • Reframing your fears.

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The Legalpreneur Podcast is advertising/marketing material. It is not legal advice. Please consult with your attorney on these topics. Copyright Legalpreneur Inc 2022

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Episode 224: Why the Fear of Failure is Fake Transcript

Andrea: [00:00:03] Welcome to the Legalpreneur Podcast. I’m your host, Andrea Sager, founder and CEO of Legalpreneur, Inc. As a serial entrepreneur and someone that works exclusively with small business owners legally protecting their business, I’m dedicated to covering common legal issues faced by business owners, providing you with the business knowledge you need to catapult your businesses growth and showing you just how some of the world’s most elite entrepreneurs have handled these legal and business issues themselves in true attorney fashion. The information in this episode is not legal advice. This is for informational purposes only, and you should always consult with your attorney before implementing any of the information in the show. Hello. Welcome back to another episode.

Andrea: [00:00:51] Of the Legalpreneur podcast. We’re going to get into the fears today. Talking fears, fears, fears, fears, and particularly the fear of failure and why I think it’s fake. We’re going to get into that. But this is going to be the last time I mentioned on the podcast about dream bigger because it’s coming up. Either you’ve got your ticket or you’re not or you don’t. We are not going to be selling tickets after September 30th, and our VIP tickets are just about sold out. We literally have like two or three left at the time of this recording. And as of September 30th, we will not even be selling general admission. So if you want to dream bigger with me in Phoenix, Arizona, October 5th to 7th, go get your ticket right now. I cannot believe it’s actually here. It is less than two weeks away. Like in two weeks, we literally, literally will be on the last day of the event. And I am just over the moon excited because this is it’s been over a year in the making. I’ve had this on my heart for well over a year and it’s finally here. It’s happening. So I’m really, really grateful that it’s. Just actually happening. That’s that’s what I’m actually just grateful for. It’s actually happening. And this morning I woke up. I was thinking about obviously I wake up and I’m like, yes, dream big is almost here.

Andrea: [00:02:16] And it hit me this morning that I’m so excited to actually meet people in person. I have met so many people online, many clients online that I’ve absolutely never met in person, which I’m going to be meeting a lot of them in two weeks at Dream Bigger. So I’m so, so, so, so excited. Oh, my gosh. I can’t even like I can’t I just can’t even describe how excited I am to actually meet people in person. Anyways, enough about my excitement. Let’s talk about fear. Oh, my gosh, you guys, so many people are held back by fear and I want to tackle it here on the podcast. Because most people think their biggest fear is that they’re going to fail. Maybe you have these dreams, these goals. But you’re scared you’re not going to achieve them. But that’s actually not the fear. And I’m not going to say it’s it’s the case for everybody. But 99% of people, the actual fear, if you think you’re scared of failing it, is not the actual fear. The true fear is actually succeeding and your life just dramatically changing because think about it. You’ve been at this life for 20, 30, 40 years. Possibly you’ve had the same exact life. It’s been very mundane. You’ve been in the same cycle. Things just haven’t changed for you and you’re feeling it in your gut.

Andrea: [00:03:53] You know, there’s more out there. You know that you can accomplish more. Maybe you have identified exactly how which I’ve talked before. Like it’s not really the how that we should be concerned with, but getting in alignment with our goals in the how just comes. But maybe you have the plan to make it happen, but you’re holding yourself back. Because you have this fear and you keep telling yourself, Oh, I’m scared, I’m going to fail. I’m scared it’s not going to happen. Guess what? You’ve been failing your whole life. You’ve been in a cycle of failure because you haven’t accomplished it yet and maybe you consider it, oh, it’s not failure because I haven’t actually gone after it yet. No, you’re failing right now because you have not yet accomplished it. And once you realize that and come to terms with it. You’re like, Oh, crap. I’m already failing because I haven’t accomplished my goal. I think that really puts a new spin on it. And so whatever your fears are. Write them down. I think this is a really good exercise for everyone to do, whether you think you have a fear of failure or not. But write down what you think you’re actually afraid of. And the reason you want to do that is because you want to dig into it.

Andrea: [00:05:26] Because what your first instinct is may not actually be the case. You may think, Oh, I’m so scared to fail. I’m so scared of this. But maybe that’s not actually the case. Because when most people think, Oh, I have this fear of failure 99% of the time, it’s not a fear failure. You’re afraid of actually succeeding and your life changing. I know many of us have these goals of launching and growing a successful business, making multiple six figures, multiple millions, whatever your goals are. I know they’re audacious, they’re ambitious, which they should be. And 100% you can accomplish every last one of them. But. If you keep this fear. From allowing you to move forward. You’re already a failure. And so I want you to really. Dig into realizing that the true fear is the fear of success and it’s okay to have fears like it is okay. I’m not going to say like, Hey, we need to dig in and get rid of all your fears. I think it’s good to notice your fears because you can then rewire them, you can reframe them, and you can just use it as a catalyst as, Oh, I’m actually scared of this. I’m actually fearing this. But you have to learn that you should just do it scared anyway. Because if not, you’re. You’re failing. You’re already a failure if you’re not going after it.

Andrea: [00:07:06] You’re in the same position. I know there’s a quote out there. I don’t know the exact quote, but. It’s like, Oh, if you’re scared of the amount of time that it’ll take you. And so you do nothing. But in six months, you’re in the same place that you are today. That’s what I’m scared of, is being in the exact same position that I am today in six months. That is a true fear of mine. Because I know where I am right now and I know where I want to be in six months. And my true fear is being in the same place. So identify what your fears are. And dig into them to figure out why am I afraid of this? So I’ll be very, very candid, some of my biggest fears. My number one biggest fear is my children not understanding why mommy travels a lot, why mommy isn’t there for every little thing. That’s one of my biggest fears. And so what I’m trying to do. Is bring them along for the ride a lot more. Last week I was at a pitch competition in San Antonio as a startup event, and I don’t well, I do know why I didn’t take the kids because I didn’t have anybody with me to help watch. But I know it was a small event and I know if I would have just brought them, somebody would have, you know, watched them while I was on stage.

Andrea: [00:08:41] But I want to bring them everywhere that I can. And it is getting harder now that Thomas is in kindergarten. But I will say they my kids will be at dream bigger. I initially I said absolutely they’re going to be there. And then I kind of was like, it’s okay. Like they don’t have to come. And I was like, no. Like, this is like this is me dreaming bigger. I want to have the kids with me as much as possible. And every time I tell them, hey, I have to go to work, I have to go travel for work. I have to go here, there. They always want to come like I want to go. I want to see you at work. And so finally, I’ve been hyping them up and I’m like, Hey, y’all want to go see Mommy at work? Like, yes. So there’s so excited this weekend we’re going to go shopping, get them some cute little clothes for dream bigger. And I just want them to see like, hey, this is Mommy actually at work. And I like this is mommy having fun? Like, this is what mommy does. You don’t have to sit in the office all day. You don’t have to be glued to a desk all day.

Andrea: [00:09:43] You get to call the shots, honey, you can do whatever you want. But anyways, I’m like, going off on a tangent here, but my fear is that my kids will resent the time that I traveled, the time that I was away, because they would rather have me at home. So. My goal is to include them as much as possible, bring them whenever I can, and, you know, be very candid with them as they grow up and let them know, hey, this is why. And I know they probably don’t care about the money. They don’t care about having the material things of possessions. They just want mommy. And. I hope that one day when they get older and they have their own aspirations, their own goals, their own dreams, they too will realize, Oh, that was Mommy’s dream. Like, yeah, she wanted to accomplish this for us, but she also wanted to do it for her. Like everything I do, yes. I want to sell Legalpreneur for $1,000,000,000. And of course, like, my kids are going to have everything, get everything. I’m not going to have any more kids. And so the two that I have now, Thomas and Ali, they’re going to get everything. I’m going to leave everything to them. But it’s it’s definitely not about being able to leave them millions or billions.

Andrea: [00:11:03] But it’s about the fact that I wanted to accomplish this. And I did. But that is my number one fear for my kids. So I would love to hear from you. What is your number one fear? Please reach out on Instagram. It’s Friday. I’m going to be checking the DMS all day and I want to share them. It can be completely anonymous and I’m going to share mine as well again on Instagram. So share it with me and hopefully we can just be accountable for each other. It’s okay to have fears, but we can’t let that stop us from moving forward. We can’t let it stop us from accomplishing our goals. I hope this is helpful. If you have a fear of failure. Hopefully you can turn it around because I can almost guarantee you it’s actually not a fear of failure. And if you think that you truly are scared of failing, I would love to hear from you as well. Why do you think you truly do have a fear of failure? Let me know in the DMS. All right, you guys. I’m out for today. Oh. Dream bigger is going to be here before we know it. I hope I get to see every single one of you listening right now. I hope I get to hug you. Hopefully you can meet the kiddos as well. And I’m.

Andrea: [00:12:28] For weeks here at Legalpreneur, we’re committed to providing a supportive legal community for all business owners. I know how scary the legal stuff can be. If you found this information helpful. I would be so grateful if you could share it with a fellow business owner. And quite frankly, it doesn’t cost anything to rate, review or subscribe to the show. Your support helps me reach more listeners, which allows me to support more business owners in their entrepreneurial journey. Have any questions or comments about the show? Feel free to drop me a line on Instagram, I promise. I read all of the messages and comments and if you want to be a guest on the show or know someone that would make a great guest, simply fill out our application form and a team member will reach out if we think it’s a good fit. I’ll see you in the next episode.

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